* [ Sweet Madness, Beautiful Release ] *
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Friday, December 5, 2008

One day, Two days, Three days, and still counting. Its been the holidays since the 18th of November and i've done nothing more productive than engaging myself in a DVD marathon. I swear, i didnt sign up for this. Its Grey's Anatomy we're talking about, not any random DVD which i picked out from the stash in my closet. Oh yea, RANDOM. Gosh, i need a Haitian to erase those memories please.

We're talking about my life. My god damn life. Have you ever wondered what is up God's sleeves sometimes? Or have you ever questioned yourself how God actually knows what is best for you? He is God, right? So He should know right? Like who i date, who i choose to spend the rest of my life with, where i study, whether i become a Chef in the future, how many kids i have, whether i name my baby girl Giselle or Kaylen, the car i drive and all the other material stuff. God knows right? Its destined to be. I am destined to reign. Right?

So many questions. So few answers. This world is filled with so much uncertainty. It aint just about what the future holds, but also, about what the next day, the next week or even the next month may bring us. Sometimes, it gets so crazy, sometimes, it gets so cranky, sometimes, its so peaceful. so quiet, and still, we dont feel happy. What's happiness? What is it to love? What's love? There's no reason to love. We just love. Don't we?

Sometimes, we just want to forget. To put it all behind us. We have to, in order to move on. Move on. That's over-rated. Fight, is the new move. Fight for what you want. Fight for your happiness. Just fight and never let go.

Space. Yes, we need space to think. Not to space out and stare at nothing. But space to really think about what we want. Space for me, for you, for us, to breathe.

Its amazing how we actually have the power to hurt the people around us. Even when we so don't mean to. But in reality, we end up hurting ourselves most of the time.

I wish i had the power to turn back time. No, sometimes, i wished i never existed. But i did, and there must be a reason for my existence.

Nuff said.

I'm rambling, as usual.
11:10 PM

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